Showing posts with label Tante. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tante. Show all posts

Cheating Is Truly a Choice

When one hears the word cheating typically one's mind equates it with relationships, marriages (i.e. spouses), and folk stepping out. It is also connected to somebody doing somebody else wrong rather than the associations of illegalities in regards to the law. One can also couple cheating with lying, tricking someone, deception and the act of imposition. There are websites on how to retaliate on cheaters, discussions on talk shows on how to survive cheating; with experts on both sides of the fence teaching forgiveness and harmonious relationships after the act has occurred. One could spend all day just breaking down the terms and thought processes around cheating and its affects and effects. Yet today, I want to cut through the chase and look at it from a spiritual perspective.
It is with clarity and understanding that we live within the confines and construct of rules in regards to relationships; and many theories and thought processes are based on culture, environment, societal relationships and or norms. To peruse generational components in history deemed that one family was given the direction to begin the population of the earth (Adam and Eve). So basically there was quite a bit of co-mingling in regards to familial relationships present. Eventually as time moved along, the earth became populated. Kings had their pick of wives; however I'm sure no one notified the Shulammite wife that she was probably 610 on a scale of almost 1,000. Or it is quite possible she was aware because of time she lived in? It might have even been acceptable to her she wasn't the only one; and it could be Solomon's game was so tight that she was a lost cause on the first few words out of his mouth. In those times women learned to share, while men conquered in war, territorial possessions and at the home front. For the history of my people; our women were impregnated for the sake of propagating slave labor and raped for the pleasure of men who power tripped and had no consideration for men or women whose blood color that ran through their veins was of the same color as their own.

The reality is cheating is truly an act of selfish desire. I realize that studies show that men think about sex every 5-7 seconds and clearly we live in a world where according to societal norms cheating is normal. However, based upon God's concept it is not. Whether a man had two or three wives and concubines, he was still required to stay within that relationship. Leviticus 20 speaks of both parties, the man and the woman being put to death - this was under the law. There are many scriptures that speak to the actions of cheating and the consequences. So with an understanding, one might begin to approach the thought process of actions and consequences and the affect and effects of the marriage and community structure. We can no longer just accept that men cheat; for now women have now begun to roll just like the men. Some do it for lack of affection, while others do it for the love of sex. Regardless of the why's it truly is a lack of discipline on either party's part. See the first time might be hard for one's conscious and heart allows one to feel remorse, but in reality the second time around it becomes easier and a continuation of sequential actions now makes cheating "normal".

Rarely does the cheater look at the people that are hurt in the process and seldom do they truly process the outcome. Most men are apt to think if they get caught they will be forgiven or "it's no big deal, everyone does it", "it's part of life". There is no fear of the consequence or more so God himself. When one lacks a true relationship with the Almighty; the consideration of where He stands in view of one's life has little affect in the assumption of carrying out sinful desires. Or one is quick to say, "God will forgive me". Yet I want you to think about this, what if God chose to take your life in the process? What if you lost your wife or relationship? What if life-threatening diseases are incurred based on that very last act of cheating? See we as responsible people must begin to look at the end of a matter before we embark on the beginning of a matter. Learn to look down the length of time and make decisions accordingly. Learn to make healthier non-selfish decisions.

My divorce was a product of continual cheating. Apparently, he chose (the ex) to make decisions based on his own personal thought process. However, I am not responsible for his actions; I was and am only responsible for mine. Clearly he thought that his continual cheating would only produce an outcome of forgiveness and life would go on. However, one episode became the final act that was forgivable; but required I take action to release him out of my life in regards to our marriage. So it is with understanding that I can share the effects of spouses that cheat. Those sequential and non-conformable acts forever changed the life of me and my children. I can share this with you with no hint of malice or bitterness. Yet it is with clarity that I state cheating ALWAYS touches someone's life. Many people around town knew my story when the details became available, yet they do not know me. Even now, every once in a while I come across someone who is aware of the effects but not the affects because they don't know me personally. I am healed...now...but back then there was a sense of not having anywhere to hide or dwell from prying eyes and people who made a choice to be just plain out right inquisitive...excuse me I mean nosy...lol. There is no shadow of doubt in my mind that God became my sustainer of my life but more so my mind. There were days I walked around in constant pain, and felt that everyone I encountered could see through me; and often I had a sense of rawness that exuded within my spirit for I truly thought others had the ability to see my various pains. Even now it is hard to explain, I guess I might equate it to your skin being raw, like someone had scrapped the skin with a knife until all you see is shredded meat (flesh), tendons, veins and cartilage. Bro/Sis, I was one shattered soul. Oh, I thank God for His comforting arms as He taught me to stand and become resilient at all costs.

I believe that every time you choose to act out of selfishness and make a decision to sin, you open up spiritual doors in your life. Even when you supposedly "fall" into a situation, you have given the enemy a legal right to have access in your life. Now I am aware that for some people they truly do not care. But today I want to speak to your spirit man. See the problem with the enemy attacking our lives is he is quite aware of whom each of us is and what we are supposed to be in Christ. Hence, he knows his access to our lives is based on our past, immediate and future actions; and if he can keep us in the dark we never truly reach the goals that God has set for us.

See your life is not just about obtaining your goals, but more so the relationship with God directly. It was and still is His desire for each of us to imitate Him. Mind you none of us is perfect nor will we ever reach perfection; however we do strive for it...(and for this we labor and strive), that we have put our hope in the living God, who is the Savior of all men, and especially of those who believe (1 Timothy 4:10)...So I strive always to keep my conscience clear before God and man (Acts 24:16) I can hear someone now....but I can't stop, that is because every door you have opened has opened another door, every time you have given the enemy access through the act of sex, more behaviors and thought processes and attacks (from satan) become more accessible; and you need to go through a process of spiritual deliverance. It might not be easy, BUT it can be done. Begin today by asking God for assistance and share with Him in prayer (communication) your true heart's desire; and ask Him for a change in lifestyle. Because man (woman) is a triune spirit then all that we do and act upon affects our body, soul and spirit. Learn to look for spiritual food, feed your soul and spirit and God will help you control your mind which translates to your eyes and actions.

Lord we ask with that everyone who is reading this right now become of aware of the issues in their life that they need assistance. We ask that you give them a spirit of forgiveness towards those that cheated on them and a spirit of repentance for those who have perpetrated the acts. In your word you told us that if we ask it shall be given to us and if we have faith as the grain of a mustard seed, our faith will grow. I ask that this word be planted on good ground and ask that you send someone else in each person's life to water it and assist in their growth in You. I speak deliverance to every spirit that binds and hinders in Jesus name and ask that you send not only spiritual guidance but your ministering angels to stand for every attack that might come their way. To every spirit of torment, I send peace, to every generational curse in regards to cheating and unclean spirits; I send joy, clarity and speak release. We ask these things in Your name. Amen.

Go in peace and I speak peace and blessings into YOUR life.

Seek to know that you might grow.

Bee Oliver

http://www.beeoliver.tumblr.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6375928
Kumpulan Cewek Toge

Three Signs That It's Love, Love, Love!

Nothing is more beautiful in life than to love and be loved. It is a gift from the stars above, a wonder that everyone should explore, cherish, and never take for granted. It is the best feeling in the world. You feel like you are floating on clouds in the sky, and swear to yourself that you could move mountains if you had to. Love is the best high anyone can experience, but how do you know when it is real love?
1. You Can Be Yourself

You know you are in love when you do not have to lose yourself for the other person. You can feel comfortable and confident about everything you value and believe in, knowing that the one you love will always support these same values and beliefs. After all, being able to share your passions with another involves a deep soul connection, an unconditional bond. Someone who cares for you and loves you will never ask you to be anyone but yourself. They will love you for who and what you are no matter what.

2. You Feel Electric

Your whole entire being has more power than you had before you met your special someone. You feel the electricity when you look into your partner's eyes. You feel the sparks when you kiss. You feel the bliss in his or her touch. You wake up in the morning knowing that your soul is happy and your heart is content. It is a power called love power, and baby there is no turning back! Embrace it, enjoy it, and electrify!

3. You are Spiritually Connected

Being in a relationship is one of the most challenging situations we could ever put ourselves into. That is why it is important to not conform to society's rules about being in a relationship. You must decide when your heart and soul is ready, and you will know when this time comes when you can form a spiritual bond with another person. It is the most uplifting and beautiful experience, to be able to learn and grow with someone you care for and love deeply.

When you meet that special someone, your better half, always remember that the journey will have its difficult moments no matter how much you love each other. It is what you learn from these moments and how you grow as a couple that really matters. Along with difficult moments will be breathtaking ones, so cherish the love you have.

Spiritual Singles provides an incredible avenue for those who are on a conscious, spiritual path to meet. We have thousands of incredible members looking to meet someone special. As you join this site, remember to be grateful in advance for already meeting your beloved. Act as if and soon it shall be: http://www.SpiritualSingles.CA

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6389166
Tante Toge Narsis




How To Fall Back In Love After An Affair

You may be wondering whether it is possible to fall in love with your husband again after an affair. You may be at the point where you have worked through the negative emotions of the affair and have a better understanding of yourself and your relationship. During this process you may have lost some of the love you had previously felt for your spouse and this is completely natural.

Here are some things you can do to find love with your husband once again.
1. Find a way to resolve conflicts

It is hard to find love again if there are a series of conflicts that need to be resolved and no way of working through them. If one partner ends up screaming or getting the silent treatment it will be hard to establish feelings of love.

You both need to understand that you will never agree on everything and both of you have the right to air your differences. It is how these differences are presented that can reduce the level of conflicts. Understanding another viewpoint is imperative at this time and must be appreciated.

Before handling any further conflicts a set of parameters should be put in place so that the tone level does not escalate. Simply establish a plain set of rules for conflict resolution that you can both agree on to keep more peace in the house.

2. Raise communication levels

Both partners in a relationship may have trouble communicating with one another. If you are not able to effectively let your husband know what is needed and wanted, how can he provide it? A lot of married women believe that the husband should be a mind reader, which leads to more conflict.

Falling in love again may be as simple as communicating with each other at a new level. Weekly meetings can be scheduled for full communication if both spouses have busy lifestyles and quite often meet each other on the go.

3. Aim for total transparency

This is an important part of falling in love again since it is the best way to rebuild trust. There has been a lot of lying and cheating going on and the only way to get past this at the beginning is to develop a transparency code between you.

Both parties will have to share their activities, including who they are seeing and what their plans are at all times. This will allow each spouse to feel safe, which is an important part of falling in love again.

It is possible to fall back in love with your husband after an affair. Many couples have been able to love each other once again after the trials and tribulations of a cheating spouse have dissipated. It is even possible to build a marriage that is stronger than it was before.

In some cases an affair brings emotions and conflicts to the surface that needed to be dealt with earlier. By being able to see them as they really are for the first time, a strong marriage foundation may be reborn. A new respect for each other can be established if both parties want this to happen. It must be mutual at both ends or there is no hope.

There are going to have to be some changes made to the relationship in order to salvage it, put it back together and then have love reappear. Remember that this is a process and is not going to happen overnight. Give it some time and do it right, and you can learn to love your husband once again.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6376356





Easy, Breezy Summer Dressing Tips

I don't know about you but in New England we went from winter to summer overnight. One day it was 49 degrees and drizzling and the next it was 85, sunny and humid. I hate it when that happens. There's a whole section of my closet waiting to be worn!

Of course, wait 5 minutes and it could all change again. I keep hoping we'll have a peek of spring sometime in the next month before we go to real true summer. But, that's the beauty of New England...you just never know.
When the weather changes so dramatically one of two things happens:

You're so excited that warm weather has finally arrived that you throw caution to the wind and shed clothing with abandon.
You were freezing one minute and now you're hot and you stare miserably and hopelessly into your closet trying to figure out how to adapt.

So, let's back up. While the first scenario might be more fun than the second (at least in the short term), chances are good that after a while you'll think...Yikes...I'm feeling cooler but I'm not sure this is the best look for me. Sometimes this leads to a fun shopping session and sometimes it leads to the second scenario above!

Before you get stuck...

Let me share some tips for dressing well, comfortably, and authentically for the summer season (and for those of you who are experiencing winter right now, save this, and it will come in handy in a few more months!):

Be prepared. While about mid-February we think spring will never come, it always does. And, often it seems to catch us by surprise. There are several reasons that being prepared makes a difference.
You'll have more choices. I agree that the retail shopping schedule is nutty (it's hard to think about buying sleeveless tops when the temperature outside is hovering around freezing, but you must). If you wait until the weather warms up and you realize you need things, it could be too late. Yes, the stores are already going into sale mode and it's barely June!

It will save your sanity. If you have ever tried to put together a seasonal wardrobe when we're in the middle of the season you know that yes, you might luck out and get everything you want (on sale even). But, more often what happens is that by the time you shop there is little left to buy...at least in your size (or so it seems). You find a great skirt but no top to go with it or you have a great pair of capris but all the good shoes in your size are gone. Not only will your sanity suffer but you'll waste time inside agonizing over how to put together a wardrobe when you could be outside enjoying the warm weather.

Is your weather fickle? In New England (and maybe other places as well) you must be prepared for the possibility of either a cool summer or a brutally hot one (like last year). By the time you know for sure what the weather will be Fall clothes are in the stores so be prepared either way or you'll be out of luck about late July if you guessed wrong!

Dress to Express. Remember my article on never settling for just 'good enough?' This is a season when I see a lot of that going around. Knowing who you are and how to reflect your personality in your wardrobe whatever the season is, is super important. It's the missing link for many women. Yes, the summer throws in monkey wrenches like sandals, capris and lightweight (a.k.a., less forgiving) fabrics, but that means it's even more important to stay true to yourself. Please never settle for just good enough! There is always a better choice (or else leave it on the rack). Listen to your inner guidance for cues as to what really speaks to you.

Understand Your Needs. Are you always hot...cold? Do you walk a lot so you need super comfortable sandals? Do you have to crawl around on the floor (with children, as an IT specialist or organizing guru), or do you run board meetings and have high-powered lunches? What about leisure time, vacation, and dressy summer events? When you are in the dressing room, be sure to ask yourself, "When will I wear this?" and "How will I complete this outfit?" The last thing you want to do is get home and realize that you bought some fun things but you still have a lot of wardrobe loose ends!

Have a Back-Up Plan. If your favorite designer has gone crazy and shows everything in chartreuse or only cap sleeved, flimsy T-shirts with cargo shorts, you want to be sure you know where to turn next. Having 2, 3 or 4 stores where you like to shop can make a frustrating shopping trip more productive and fun. You just leave and head to another store.

A love affair with linen. One of the first questions I ask clients at this time of year is...do you love linen or hate it. No one is neutral on this! If you love it great, but you might want other alternatives for those days when linen doesn't feel right (you're not in the mood for the rumpled look) or you just want a change. This season has been great for that.

There are lots of pretty jackets and sweaters with a loose weave that let you stay cool but still feel covered, pulled-together, or professional (or whatever your reason is for wearing another layer).

Or, a short-sleeved jacket can be a good alternative (be careful, though, this look can get frumpy in a heartbeat).

I'm sharing this now because there is still time to create a fabulous wardrobe for the summer. Hey, it's a beautiful season when we don't have to be all bundled up and wearing our snow boots. You want to spend as much time as possible enjoying the experience and not dreading getting dressed every day. Take a few minutes to plan your wardrobe now and then you can relax and enjoy the rest of the season with delicious abandon!

Do you avidly watch shows like "What Not to Wear" and think "if only I could have a wardrobe makeover," but you can't see how the transformation would translate for you? Then I can help. Over the past 23 years as a fashion stylist in the Boston area, I have found that many women are ignoring, hiding or are just plain unaware of their innate beauty. Believe it or not, you do not have to be rich and famous or young and thin to have the look you dream of. Yes, with a little guidance you can learn how to dress with joy and ease.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6345324


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