That first love is one that will make your heart skip a beat. The exhilaration you feel is almost like a drug and you never want it to end. Sometimes, though, people will drift apart and the cracks in the relationship are non-repairable. The relationship inevitably ends. Obviously, if you were in agreement with this decision to end the relationship, there are no issues. However, often there is one person that wants to end the relationship and the other that doesn't want it to end. As glorious as that first love is, the end of it can be quite devastating. Let me tell you I have been there, done that, lived through it and survived. You can too.
If you are like me you will be in shock. It felt like a nightmare. I kept trying to pick up the pieces and no matter what I said or did, it didn't matter. He wanted out. Can I tell you that it felt like someone had died? He was still there so why did I feel that way? Well in essence there was a death. The relationship was dead and I was grieving the loss. I couldn't go on, or so I thought. Remember though, there are breakups every single day. While a lot of those people get back together, some will not. Yet these people survive. Not only do they survive but they go on to flourish in other relationships.
How do you get through this to the other side when you feel like there is no way you can get there? You must allow yourself to grieve. It's okay to feel sad. Acknowledge how you feel, allow yourself time to digest what is happening to you. It isn't going to be easy but remember you are not alone. People break up every day. They go on to bigger loves. Hold on to that thought as you embrace this new change.
Many of your friends will want to be near you now. They will see your sadness and will try to help you. Let them help you. There is no greater time that you need help, love and support than now. Listen to what they are saying. They are objective and can see things clearly, while at this point you are unable to.
It feels like you are the only one that feels this depth of sadness but you aren't. It is good to grieve but you don't want to dwell on the sadness. You need to work at feeling healthy again. If you are unable to feel like there are any blessings in your life take some time to sit down and write some down. There are so many gifts you have been given and it is now time to realize this. Look at all you have in your life. When you are feeling down, take that paper out and look at it to remind of that wonderful life you have.
You need to remember that there are so many other opportunities for love. Many times without these breakups people would not have found the love of their lives. I am believer that things happen for a reason. When one door closes another will open. Try telling yourself that as you work your way back from this breakup. You are one of a kind, unique and worthy of so much more. Never let one person define who you are. It is time to move on to bigger, brighter, better things. You are on your way.
